I Guess I’m Still Me…

As I have mentioned before I am not a flirt, if anything I am the opposite, I am a non flirt, a nirt if you will. Yes that’s right, I just made up an awesome new word. I become an incompetent nerd around men who are attractive. Give them a great personality on top of the hotness and I am screwed. I think a part of me thought that moving to another country might take away some of my 13 year old girl insecurity. Because now I am the foreigner…I am interesting if only for the sole reason that I am not from here. I lived in Los Angeles for the past nine years, that has to be interesting right. I have the accent now. Yet, that stupid 13 year old girl inside of me keeps rearing her ugly head. Truth, I am interesting, and not in a bragging because I am great way, but I have had a pretty interesting life. I am musician and I just left everything for adventure. Yet around cute men I become mute. Case in point my latest adventure into the city.

Here I am all excited to go exploring on my own in Sydney, I’m all by myself. I walk to the train station and am immediately overcome with confusion, concerned that I am getting on the wrong train. Right next to me is a very cute Australian boy…let me stress again…VERY CUTE! Here is my opportunity to be not me…after all I am starting over in a new country, be bold Kara, talk to him, ask for help. Do I do that…NOOOOOOO…of course not. That would be to cool. Instead He looks my way and I look down at the ground obviously very preoccupied with whatever is staring back at me. Smooth move Kara. Next instead of asking cute boy for directions, which will in turn lead to a conversation about where I am from, which will then lead to a date and the ultimate end of marital bliss, I call my friend who I am staying with to make sure I am about to board the right train. STUPID STUPID Me! Ahh…good bye Australian husband, we would have had a wonderful life together ;). So here I am in a new Country still being my awkward self and trying to convince myself that I am a beautiful confident women, any man would be lucky to be with me. Yay, same girl, still awkward. If only moving would rid me of my 13 year old self!


Facebook Stalking 101

What was life like before Google, before Facebook, before Twitter? Google and Facebook blew up while I was in college. I was one of the early facebook adopters when facebook was only for those who went to college. So I remember life before all this crazy stalking business begin, when a stalker was someone who followed you around and hid outside in the bushes. Were are all guilty of it, looking up someone who we used to go to school with, someone we used to date, someone we used to like, or currently do. We all do it. We all stalk whether we want to admit it or not is another story. I admit it. I am totally guilty of the all the things mentioned above. My 10 year reunion is this year, there is a facebook group devoted to it. I’m not friends with a lot of the people I went to high school with on facebook, but most of them are in this group, as am I. Have I looked at their profiles, yes. Do I know how many kids they have, what they look like, and what their spouse looks like, yes. Thank you facebook for turning me into a stalker. And I know I am not the only one guilty of this. How do I know this, because some of these kids have commented on my photos, so they to know whatever I alloy them to by means of facebook.

I miss dating pre-social network. It’s a whole new ball game now that we have so many outlets to “get to know” someone. Every guy I have dated since this phenomenon has occurred has first pursued me on facebook or myspace. I met him in real life, but then he would find my profile, add me as a friend, and then begin to message me. This all went on for weeks, sometimes months before an actual date took place. You can find out a lot about someone by seeing their profile. It’s kind of weird. Not only do we have social networking, but we also have Google. Oh Google you make stalking so easy. I Google guys before I go out with them, and so do most girls I know. I know more about them then I should thanks to Google.

So what happens when you have been to sick to go to work, but not sick enough to sleep all day long? You get really good at your stalking skills. Oh and you might do things that are out of character for you as well. Not feeling well, and bored, I decided to peruse match.com. Made a profile, with no intention to ever pay for it, or even put up a picture. I have a lot of friends who have met on dating websites and those friends are very happy. So I thought I would just see “what’s out there”. You can see people’s pictures and see their profiles without paying. I got matched with a really cute guy. Like to cute to be on a site like match. I showed my friend Rachel his profile. She agreed, it’s got to be some sort of scam, as in he is either not honest in his pics, or he is just a creep. I decided to find out. So I did a Google search on his name along with a little bit of info on his profile. Bingo…Found! (I always knew I would make an excellent spy.) So I think it is the cold medicine taking over, but I did something completely out of character. I found him on facebook and sent him a message. He wrote back…probably won’t turn into anything, but wouldn’t it be fun if it did?