What to Do if You Get Asked Out By a Bus Driver

Hello, long lost blog! I really need to pick up writing in this old thing. So far nothing note worthy has really taken place, other than a lot of transition into living a new life. Oh change, how you mock me. So you are all probably wondering what the above title has to do with the post, well pretty much everything! Life in Australia has been the complete opposite so far from my old life. Seriously…EVERYTHING is different. I am testing out my theory though on a particular difference. Only one is all my time living in the US did I ever get randomly asked out, and by random, I mean a total stranger. That one time consisted of a gentleman who I gave my parking spot to, since I was leaving. He happened to find one before I got to mine and then bolted across the parking lot to find me and asked me to coffee. I lied and told said gentleman that I had boyfriend. Because why in the world would I go out with someone who I have never even had a conversation with…I call rape!

So with that said, I got asked out the other day, by the bus driver. The first and only time that I have taken the bus here, I get propositioned. And yes…I froze…I didn’t know what to do. So I said yes…lucky for me though I had to get off the bus and was unable to exchange information. So no bus driver date for me. Ahh…that was a close one. I guess I don’t think I can pull out the boyfriend card here quite yet. So the answer to the above question is…Tell them you have a boyfriend. Or, if you are interested…go out with them. But in my case it was a stranger and the boyfriend card would have been well used. So, if everything else here is backwards, maybe my dating life will be to and I have many more random date propositions. One can only hope 😉


I Guess I’m Still Me…

As I have mentioned before I am not a flirt, if anything I am the opposite, I am a non flirt, a nirt if you will. Yes that’s right, I just made up an awesome new word. I become an incompetent nerd around men who are attractive. Give them a great personality on top of the hotness and I am screwed. I think a part of me thought that moving to another country might take away some of my 13 year old girl insecurity. Because now I am the foreigner…I am interesting if only for the sole reason that I am not from here. I lived in Los Angeles for the past nine years, that has to be interesting right. I have the accent now. Yet, that stupid 13 year old girl inside of me keeps rearing her ugly head. Truth, I am interesting, and not in a bragging because I am great way, but I have had a pretty interesting life. I am musician and I just left everything for adventure. Yet around cute men I become mute. Case in point my latest adventure into the city.

Here I am all excited to go exploring on my own in Sydney, I’m all by myself. I walk to the train station and am immediately overcome with confusion, concerned that I am getting on the wrong train. Right next to me is a very cute Australian boy…let me stress again…VERY CUTE! Here is my opportunity to be not me…after all I am starting over in a new country, be bold Kara, talk to him, ask for help. Do I do that…NOOOOOOO…of course not. That would be to cool. Instead He looks my way and I look down at the ground obviously very preoccupied with whatever is staring back at me. Smooth move Kara. Next instead of asking cute boy for directions, which will in turn lead to a conversation about where I am from, which will then lead to a date and the ultimate end of marital bliss, I call my friend who I am staying with to make sure I am about to board the right train. STUPID STUPID Me! Ahh…good bye Australian husband, we would have had a wonderful life together ;). So here I am in a new Country still being my awkward self and trying to convince myself that I am a beautiful confident women, any man would be lucky to be with me. Yay, same girl, still awkward. If only moving would rid me of my 13 year old self!

I’m back!

Oh how I have missed you blog! I’m all moved, to another country. That’s right I have left the comforts of the US all in the name of adventure and moved to Sydney Australia. Now that I am all moved I plan on reviving this thing as I have MUCH more free time than normal and the ability to blog. I don’t have a job, or friends, so for now lets take the time to focus on this blog. I have been writing a million posts in this noggin of mine and can’t wait to get it all out on “paper”. Ahh…It feels good to be back!

Moving your life halfway across the world causes a girl to reflect, and redefine things. It also causes a ton of self discovery. My current discovery is a doosey! I am the ex girlfriend that every boyfriend hates. Why…do you ask? Well it is really quite humorous. I have remained close to every mom of every boyfriend I have had. The men may have been douches, but they have wonderful moms who adore me and I them. I made this discovery as the first few people I talked to when I finally got over here was the mothers of my ex boyfriends. I laughed when I realized this. I don’t talk to them. There is no communication between me and the ex’s but I still go to coffee with the mom’s or now I skype with them. Ha! I refuse to give them up. I love them, they have been mom’s to me too. Especially when my own mother is far away and has never really understood me. To the Ex’s I’m sorry that your mom’s love me so much, but get used to it! 😉

Every Once and Awhile I Revert Back to a 13 Year Old Girl

So here is some embarrassing truth for you all. I am 28 years old and have no freakin idea how to be normal around men who are prospects. This was my self discovery of the weekend. To help understand my lovely little issue lets take a step back in time. I was always a late bloomer growing up. The shortest one in my class as well as the thinnest. I didn’t hit puberty till way after all the rest of the girls. This is paying off now in my late 20s as I am frequently mistaken for a 20 year old. Another side note. When I was 13 I had to get glasses, not only that, but I had already been wearing braces for 3 years. Add in the gangly awkwardness of not quite hitting puberty and you have a highly vivacious 13 year old girl. I purposely do not put up pictures on this site in order to keep me identity a secret. I don’t look like that 13 year old anymore. I grew up. I’m 5’8 blond hair blue eyes and a size 0 to 1. Best part, is that even though I am thin, I have a nice hour glass figure. I have been approached to model on more than one occasion. I make friends at the drop of a hat. I mean I’ve been a bridesmaid 8 times now! 🙂 I’m not socially awkward. I tell you all this so that you’ll understand my messed up psyche. 🙂

In my head I am still this awkward 13 year old. I have this ridiculous fear that if I pay any attention to a guy he will be grossed out and reject me. Just like 13 year old me. Case in point this weekend. If I have NO interest in him. I will be charming, flirtation, and funny. I will be fully myself, cause I could care less if he is interested in me. This is why every guy I have dated and subsequently have not worked out is because I was not interested in them to begin with. They fell for me because I was fully myself, but I really didn’t care about them. All the ex’s have been guys who have gown on me, like a fungus. You should have seen me flirting with the cute bell hop from the hotel event and the random security guard. Why? Cause I could care less. Yes they were cute, but t0o young, and best of all they don’t live anywhere near me and I am leaving. Plus this whole being  a Christian thing seriously limits my dating pool. I knew that nothing would come of it and therefore I was myself.

Funny thing is, you put me in the exact same situation with a cute guy my age, someone who has the same morals and values as myself and I become a mute awkward 13 year old. With an intense fear that I will gross them out if I even look in their direction. I have to learn how to beat this horrible habit I have of looking at the ground for fear of accidentally making eye contact which will in turn make them run for the hills from my ugly face. Again, I know this is all in my head, but man, its hard work to fight what you feel to be true. I am envious of the girls who are able to always be themselves around everyone. So am I the only one that this happens to? Anyone know how to beat the case of the awkward 13 year old girl?

eHarmony, An Experiment

I have a friend who recently signed up for eHarmony. She fought for awhile, but finally decided that if she really wants to be dating, she better be proactive and take a step. It’s funny how this whole online dating thing is becoming the norm. Over half of my friends have met their spouses online. We live in a generation where people don’t know how to date, and when you never meet new people, that doesn’t help either. So Rachel decided to take the personality profile with no thoughts of actually signing up for the service. After she finished the test they started sending her matches, quite a few actually, and many of them requested communication. The trick of eHarmony, is that you can see their profiles without paying, but not their pictures. This will drive you just crazy enough that you suck it up and pay in order to make sure you are not missing out on anything good. In comes my experiment.

When Rachel told me that she really wanted to see all these men who had requested communication and had decided to sign up for their three month special, I got really excited! Yay for social experiments! She had ten men who had requested communication with her. Before she paid I sat down with her and had her read all ten of their profiles and comment on who caught her attention and who did not, based solely on their info. It felt like Christmas morning, here she had ten shiny packages under the tree, but the question is…is it jewelry, or sock and underwear? Viewing their profiles before looking at their pictures was like shaking the presents to see if you can figure out which ones you think will be the best.

Out of the ten, three were immediately ruled out based on their horrid profiles. One guy was 5’2 – too short! Another wrote like a complete ass and bored both of us before we even got through his first paragraph. And lastly, another looked to be unemployed and lazy…NO THANK YOU! Those three were put into socks and underwear present pile. five were deemed possibilities, nothing stood out, but nothing made her uneasy either these seemed like they might be good presents. Two however, really stood out. They were the presents on Christmas morning that you wanted to open first, the ones who looked like they might be just what you asked for.

Now came the exciting part, paying…this means she finally gets to open her presents and see how many pairs of socks and underwear she got vs. the new ipad, or pretty jewelry. So the three that she labeled socks and underwear…she was right on. Weird, weird guys! Their profiles matched their rather interesting pictures. Of the five who may or may not have been underwear two were ok, the other three…yay…they broke all the profile rules when it comes to pictures. Pictures with girls, with babies, with your shirt off…epic fail! The other two she decided to give a chance, honestly, she wasn’t really attracted to them, but decided to give it a try anyway. The ones she was really excited about it….well…it is eHarmony. One of them looked like he was in his 50s and the other, not really her type either, but she is giving him a chance because he impressed her so much.

Here is the problem with online dating. We as people want to be with someone we are attracted to both physically and mentally. Unfortunately, being able to judge someone based on a picture is hard. We are bombarded everyday with images of perfect people and when the men or women on these sites don’t fit that, are tendency is to “close” them because they are not what we are looking for. It’s pretty much shopping for a mate. Yes, you do the same thing in real life, we judge the package, but at the same time you get to know whats inside and sometimes that changes the way the packages appears. Online dating sites let you judge the package before ever getting to know whats inside. I’m interested to see what happens in her new adventure. My prediction, it’s not going to be the pretty guy she is looking for who is going to grab her attention. It’s going to be the boy next door, who she wants to close, but will give him a chance, because she has me looking over her shoulder ;). At first glance he is not going to be what she thought she wanted, but he will turn out to be all that and more. Can’t wait to see how this story ends!

Would You Change The Past?

I had a super fun social day today. Those days are my favorite. The kind of days when I get to see a lot of friends. What I find interesting is that the friends that I hung out with today I met through a past relationship. Things did not work out with David, but because I dated him, I know Sophia, Paige, and Jenny. These girls make my life better and are so much fun. I feel like me when I am around them and though my heart was hurt by David, I wouldn’t change a thing, because if I didn’t date him, I wouldn’t be friends with those girls. Life is funny, it may not work out how you imagined it, but it always works out how it is supposed to. God knew that I needed them. So my question to you is this…if you could change your past…would you?

What’s so Bad About Being Single?

See this attractive man, sporting a stunning outfit of cutoff shorts and a tank top. Well, lets just say he is better dressed and more attractive then the men that I met tonight. As part of my redesign my life plan…aka things need to change or I move to Australia…I have decided to venture outside of my comfort zone. Tonight was one of those failed attempts.

Rachel and I have recently started going to a new church. Here in lies the problem. We would really like to meet people, men and women, who are in the same life stage as us. As in late 20s to early 30s career minded, married, single, kids, no kids, does not matter to me. Just same life stage. That seems like an easy request right? WRONG! You see the church does not know how to create programs for people in their late 20s to early 30s. Instead, they label these groups the dreaded singles groups. Guess what, don’t like the label and I as sure as hell don’t want to be seen in one of these groups. The Singles label makes you seem desperate and pathetic no one in their right mind who is a fully capable, semi attractive, or a slightly intelligent human being wants to be labeled as such. “Single” has come to imply desperate and unattractive with little to no personality, in the church world. In enters tonight’s monstrosity.

Due to the fact that Rachel and I don’t know anyone our age, we decide reluctantly, to check out the dreaded 20s-30s group. Which unfortunately carries the label “singles group”. Neither one of us is to thrilled by this prospect, but we go anyway. Why not right? It might end up being an awesome group of people. Wrong again. I once again learned that my gut is always right. ALWAYS! Damn it for being so spot on. Rachel and I show up on time and go and sit at a table with two other girls who have never been here before either. As I scan the room I see many people who fit the “singles” category. The men, fat, old, and horribly unattractive. I believe some were even wearing sweat pants for I am sure that jeans would have been a little to binding for them. The women, looked as though many of them had stepped out of 1985. No makeup sweats and 80s hairstyles. Like I said before, I am bitch and there were just so many jokes running through my head as I looked around the room. Poor Rachel couldn’t even make eye contact with me as we would start laughing at how uncomfortable we were. Rachel mind you is beautiful, has great hair, and is a good dresser. Needless to say she stuck out like a midget playing for an NBA team. It was as if Christian Mingle had come to life. The one male who happened to join are table looked as though he was in his mid 40s and as creepy as they come. Within the first few minutes he was talking about his high profile clients and how much money he deals with. Guess what creeper, no one cares. Most awkward part of the evening was when two other girls, who were regular attenders asked us if we would be returning next week. Rachel replied, well…maybe. Which translates into Hell No! The only good thing to come out of this horribly weird experience is that we were right. Anything labeled singles will bring out the weirdo’s oh and now we have some great stories to tell and memories to laugh at.

Seriously, where are all the normal ones?